Oh snap, my blunt fell from behind my ear!
Randy to the Pats
This might go down as the best or worst move the Patriots have ever made. Randy Moss is my favorite receiver and an obvious game-changer. Will Belichick shape him up, or at least harness his power a la Phil Jackson and Rodman? Or will we get the sulking, anti-hustle Moss that moped around the sidelines in Oakland for two years? I'm hoping for the former, and if it makes a difference, I'll hook Randy up with trees every blue moon. Just make sure he comes with the straight cash, homey.
The Patriots also drafted Brandon Merriweather, a safety out of the U most famous for stomping the shit out of some cats on Florida International and busting caps on the punks that shot his teammate in the ass cheeks. We should probably come up with a arcade game-based nickname for him, stat. I'm gonna go with "Spy Hunter" for the time being.
Sox take 2 of 3 in the Bronx
Except for a little stumble over Kei Igawa, the Red Sox have looked unbeatable against New York this year, what with the back-to-back-to-back-to-back homers and the late inning comebacks and all. Now that it's no longer April, I think it's safe to say that the Red Sox have been pretty impressive. Their continued success will depend on the health of their outfield and the consistency of their pitching staff. Adding Jon Lester can only help that, as every game Julian Tavarez starts is difficult to win.
Julian is not a girl's name!
This Just In: Yanks rookie Phil Hughes takes a no-hitter into the 7th, and then: the leg is swept. Hughes will be down for a month at least, and New York continues to be fucked.
